As an only child and mom to an only, I really don’t understand why people ask whether my son’s lonely. He isn’t. I wasn’t. Many of us, in fact, learn how to play independently and find really creative ways to do so. It’s great! I had to leave a Facebook group recently because rather than celebrate being One and Done, I found that the group was filled with women (I’ve NEVER seen guys post - unless they only do so anonymously) who complain about being on the fence. It was getting tiresome!
HAHA this is partly why I can't stand facebook groups! Good for you for honoring your boundary and thanks for sharing the beauty of being a very happy only child raising an only! I also LOVED babysitters club books and same--could not relate to Claudia as much. But now I wonder how they were so young and babysitting people's kids and wonder if I would ever let a 11 yo babysit my kid! :)
It was the 80s/90s. Different times. My parents "hired" a girl from our neighbourhood when I was four to help out and teach me English. My grandmother was home at the time and it allowed her to prep dinner while that older kid played with me. She was 11 when she first started and worked for two years, sharing the role with her older sister who was two years older. I don't think her sister really liked coming (#becauseteenagers) as much. The girls were my first exposure to Judaism when they had to take a day off for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.
My son is an only child. I am an older mom and I had PCOS and a miscarriage 2 years after my son was born. I feel bad that we didn't have a sibling for him, but he seems happy the way he is. He is independent, yet he has his own friends. He is ok with his own company and has so many interests. I think only children have a close bond to their parents than children with siblings, it's a different dynamic. He likes being an only child and he would tell others that when he was younger. He can't imagine having a sibling because this is what he knows. There are no guarantees that there will be a close relationship with your siblings either. There can be joy and heartache with siblings. I am the middle of 3 and my husband is youngest of 5. Having 1 works for us. It's a gift, being a mother that I didn't even think I would have
I’ve been a fence-sitter for a while because I adored my brother. I always thought that I’d have more than one because of that. But it hasn’t worked out that way. So I love reading about people who are happy only children, happily raising only children! It’s such a great counter balance to the pervasive questions and pressure we receive from people who couldn’t imagine having less than 2-3 children. I work part-time in the perinatal loss community and I’m reminded every day that my “only” would be more than enough for so many people who do not have living children. It would be everything. That perspective has offered so much nourishment to me during times when I feel less sure. I’d love to hear more about how you clap back in the scenarios where you’re encountering people who question your family’s enough-ness. I think we all need more language for that!
HAHA this is partly why I can't stand facebook groups! Good for you for honoring your boundary and thanks for sharing the beauty of being a very happy only child raising an only! I also LOVED babysitters club books and same--could not relate to Claudia as much. But now I wonder how they were so young and babysitting people's kids and wonder if I would ever let a 11 yo babysit my kid! :)
It was the 80s/90s. Different times. My parents "hired" a girl from our neighbourhood when I was four to help out and teach me English. My grandmother was home at the time and it allowed her to prep dinner while that older kid played with me. She was 11 when she first started and worked for two years, sharing the role with her older sister who was two years older. I don't think her sister really liked coming (#becauseteenagers) as much. The girls were my first exposure to Judaism when they had to take a day off for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.
My son is an only child. I am an older mom and I had PCOS and a miscarriage 2 years after my son was born. I feel bad that we didn't have a sibling for him, but he seems happy the way he is. He is independent, yet he has his own friends. He is ok with his own company and has so many interests. I think only children have a close bond to their parents than children with siblings, it's a different dynamic. He likes being an only child and he would tell others that when he was younger. He can't imagine having a sibling because this is what he knows. There are no guarantees that there will be a close relationship with your siblings either. There can be joy and heartache with siblings. I am the middle of 3 and my husband is youngest of 5. Having 1 works for us. It's a gift, being a mother that I didn't even think I would have
I’ve been a fence-sitter for a while because I adored my brother. I always thought that I’d have more than one because of that. But it hasn’t worked out that way. So I love reading about people who are happy only children, happily raising only children! It’s such a great counter balance to the pervasive questions and pressure we receive from people who couldn’t imagine having less than 2-3 children. I work part-time in the perinatal loss community and I’m reminded every day that my “only” would be more than enough for so many people who do not have living children. It would be everything. That perspective has offered so much nourishment to me during times when I feel less sure. I’d love to hear more about how you clap back in the scenarios where you’re encountering people who question your family’s enough-ness. I think we all need more language for that!
Ps I am Team Claudia 4eva. I feel like she was the OG manic pixie dream girl and I wanted to be her so badly!