Should "Master" still be used for young boys? DID you know that it was used for young boys? Should young boy, therefore be Mr. and young girls be Ms.? Should we do away with it, period?
As someone from a different culture, I really struggled with this in Canada. In Texas, everyone is ma’am and sir, regardless of age, even tiny children, unless you are the same age and already friends. The surface level of politeness papers over a lot of racism and prejudice, but it also maintains and constructs a certain level of respect. I miss it. Here, a (Black) preschool teacher took me aside and old me not to teach it to my kids. She understood where I come from it’s a mark of respect, but here, she said, it smacks of slavery (like master) and she’s sure that’s not what I meant. So I stopped. The kids learned to say Mr. and Ms. but never ma’am or sir.
For Anglos in Texas, titles are all about relationships. Aunt or Auntie are reserved for relatives of your parents’ generation or older, or *lifetime* friends of your parents. Friends, neighbors, church and community members are Miz or Mr. First name. Note I say Miz, which is how Miss is pronounced in TX. Ms. is neither here nor there. Mrs. first name is occasionally used, but not as often. sometimes Mrs. is followed by the husband’s work title (eg Mrs. Preacher), though that’s been dying out since the 80s. Mr. or Mrs. Surname is used with everyone else. By my childhood, Master was only used on formal invitations, never spoken. Miss (Miz) is still used frequently with very young girls. I used to direct the children’s choirs at my church, and there’s a lot of people that still refer to me as Miz C (which conveniently works for both names) and someone will correct them and tease it’s Dr. C now, don’t you know.
And back to Canada, when I returned from marrying over Xmas break 2005-6, my students collectively switched from Prof. Cain to Mrs. Cain in acknowledgment. I told them they were welcome to call me Mrs. Gogoladze (and spelled it), but that I was not Mrs. Cain. Not surprisingly everyone quickly switched back to Prof. Cain.
Growing up, I addressed all my friends' parents as Mr. and Mrs. Lastname (save for those who were doctors) unless they came from the same culture as me, where it would be Uncle and Auntie Firstname. It was a little weird to me when they weren't friends of my parents, but it was "expected" so I did it. Their grandparents were though Gung Gung and Poh Poh (maternal grandfather and maternal grandmother)(, even though they weren't MY Gung Gung and Poh Poh! These days, I'm just plain Cynthia to most of my son's friends. Mr. and Ms. are for teachers only (and in many cases, it's first name. I think it has to do with some last names being difficult to pronounce)! I'm also perfectly fine with being called "ma'am" though most of my (Canadian) peers think I'm crazy!
As someone from a different culture, I really struggled with this in Canada. In Texas, everyone is ma’am and sir, regardless of age, even tiny children, unless you are the same age and already friends. The surface level of politeness papers over a lot of racism and prejudice, but it also maintains and constructs a certain level of respect. I miss it. Here, a (Black) preschool teacher took me aside and old me not to teach it to my kids. She understood where I come from it’s a mark of respect, but here, she said, it smacks of slavery (like master) and she’s sure that’s not what I meant. So I stopped. The kids learned to say Mr. and Ms. but never ma’am or sir.
For Anglos in Texas, titles are all about relationships. Aunt or Auntie are reserved for relatives of your parents’ generation or older, or *lifetime* friends of your parents. Friends, neighbors, church and community members are Miz or Mr. First name. Note I say Miz, which is how Miss is pronounced in TX. Ms. is neither here nor there. Mrs. first name is occasionally used, but not as often. sometimes Mrs. is followed by the husband’s work title (eg Mrs. Preacher), though that’s been dying out since the 80s. Mr. or Mrs. Surname is used with everyone else. By my childhood, Master was only used on formal invitations, never spoken. Miss (Miz) is still used frequently with very young girls. I used to direct the children’s choirs at my church, and there’s a lot of people that still refer to me as Miz C (which conveniently works for both names) and someone will correct them and tease it’s Dr. C now, don’t you know.
And back to Canada, when I returned from marrying over Xmas break 2005-6, my students collectively switched from Prof. Cain to Mrs. Cain in acknowledgment. I told them they were welcome to call me Mrs. Gogoladze (and spelled it), but that I was not Mrs. Cain. Not surprisingly everyone quickly switched back to Prof. Cain.
Growing up, I addressed all my friends' parents as Mr. and Mrs. Lastname (save for those who were doctors) unless they came from the same culture as me, where it would be Uncle and Auntie Firstname. It was a little weird to me when they weren't friends of my parents, but it was "expected" so I did it. Their grandparents were though Gung Gung and Poh Poh (maternal grandfather and maternal grandmother)(, even though they weren't MY Gung Gung and Poh Poh! These days, I'm just plain Cynthia to most of my son's friends. Mr. and Ms. are for teachers only (and in many cases, it's first name. I think it has to do with some last names being difficult to pronounce)! I'm also perfectly fine with being called "ma'am" though most of my (Canadian) peers think I'm crazy!